General Hockey Jokes
1.Why was the hockey rink so cold?
Because it’s full of fans!
2.What’s a hockey player’s favorite type of
cake?
Ice-cream cake!
3.Why did the hockey player bring string to the
game?
To tie up the score!
4.What do you call a hockey player with great
manners?
A goal-d gentleman!
5.How do hockey players stay in shape?
They do ice-olation exercises!
Punny Hockey Jokes
6.Why did the hockey puck break up with the
stick?
It felt like it was being used!
7.What’s a goalie’s favorite type of music?
Goal-dies but goodies!
8.What does a hockey player eat for
breakfast?
Hat-trick pancakes!
9.Why did the referee go to school?
To get a degree in penalty killing!
10. How do hockey players keep cool?
They stand next to the fans!
Hockey Animals Jokes
11. Why don’t bears play hockey?
They can’t find their bear-ings on the ice!
12. What do you call a hockey-playing
penguin?
An ice bird!
13. Why did the cat become a hockey player?
It wanted to be a purr-fessional!
14. What’s a dog’s favorite hockey position?
Goal-d retriever!
15. Why did the chicken cross the hockey
rink?
To check out the penalty box!
Hockey Player Jokes
16. What’s a hockey player’s least favorite
type of candy?
Jawbreakers!
17. Why did the hockey player bring a ladder
to practice?
To reach new heights!
18. What do hockey players and magicians
have in common?
Hat tricks!
19. Why was the hockey player such a great
singer?
Because they had good ice-olation!
20. What do you call a lazy hockey player?
A puck potato!
Goalie Jokes
21. Why did the goalie visit the bank?
To save money!
22. What’s a goalie’s favorite vegetable?
Blocking broccoli!
23. Why do goalies make great friends?
They’re always saving the day!
24. How do goalies eat their meals?
With a big save-r!
25. Why did the goalie fail art class?
They couldn’t draw the line!
More General Hockey Jokes
26. Why did the hockey player go to music
school?
To learn how to conduct power plays!
27. Why don’t hockey players like to play
hide-and-seek?
Because good players are always spotted!
28. How do hockey players like their eggs?
Hat-trick style!
29. What do you call a hockey player’s party?
A puck-tacular event!
30. Why was the hockey player always calm?
They kept their cool on the ice!
Knock-Knock Hockey Jokes
31. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ice.
Ice who?
Ice to meet you at the rink!
32. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Stanley.
Stanley who?
Stan-ley Cup—let’s win it!
33. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Puck.
Puck who?
Puck up your skates; it’s game time!
34. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Chill.
Chill who?
Chill out, the game’s about to start!
35. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Score.
Score who?
Score one for the home team!
Hockey and School Jokes
36. Why did the hockey player get detention?
They kept icing their homework!
37. What do you call a smart hockey player?
A schol-arctic athlete!
38. Why did the hockey player get an A in
math?
They were great at calculating angles!
39. What subject do hockey players hate the
most?
History—it’s too full of penalties!
40. Why do hockey players excel in science?
They understand the physics of ice!
Hockey Rink Jokes
41. Why was the hockey rink so noisy?
Because all the fans were screaming!
42. What did one hockey rink say to the
other?
Stay cool, my friend!
43. Why did the hockey rink apply for a job?
It wanted to get a fresh start with a clean
sheet!
44. Why do hockey rinks never gossip?
They keep everything on the ice!
45. What’s a hockey rink’s favorite type of
weather?
Snow—it’s ice-tacular!
Hockey Equipment Jokes
46. What do hockey players say to their
sticks?
“Thanks for the support!”
47. Why did the hockey stick get a promotion?
It was outstanding in its field!
48. What do you call a hockey puck with a bad
attitude?
A rebel on ice!
49. Why did the helmet feel important?
It was head of the team!
50. What do hockey gloves say when they’re
happy?
“We’re in good hands!”
Punny Hockey Jokes
51. What’s a hockey player’s favorite cereal?
Cheer-ios!
52. Why don’t hockey players ever get
sunburned?
They always play in the shade of the rink!
53. What do you call a hockey team that wins
a lot?
A-goal-lactic champions!
54. What’s a hockey player’s favorite shape?
The puck-tagon!
55. Why did the referee become a comedian?
They had great timing on calls!
More Goalie Jokes
56. Why was the goalie always invited to
parties?
Because they were great at blocking drama!
57. What’s a goalie’s favorite type of weather?
A save-storm!
58. Why do goalies never lose their keys?
They always make a save!
59. What’s a goalie’s favorite board game?
Save the World!
60. Why did the goalie bring a broom to the
rink?
To sweep the competition!
Team Spirit Jokes
61. Why did the hockey team go to the
bakery?
They needed some dough for their sticks!
62. What do you call a team of hardworking
hockey players?
Goal-diggers!
63. Why do hockey teams always do well in
school?
They’re great at passing!
64. Why did the hockey team always smile?
They were having a puck-tastic time!
65. What did the hockey coach say to their
sleepy team?
“Wake up! We’ve got goals to achieve!”
Coach Jokes
66. Why was the hockey coach a great
musician?
They knew how to conduct plays!
67. What did the coach say when the team got
thirsty?
“Water you waiting for? Stay hydrated!”
68. Why did the hockey coach bring a ladder
to practice?
To help the team reach their goals!
69. What’s a coach’s favorite kind of joke?
Pun-alties!
70. Why was the hockey coach always calm?
They kept their cool under pressure!
Fan Jokes
71. Why do hockey fans always carry tissues?
In case of ice-cidents!
72. What did one hockey fan say to the other?
“I’m hooked on this sport!”
73. Why did the hockey fan sit in the front
row?
To get the “puck-ture perfect” view!
74. What do hockey fans do when they’re
bored?
They check out the highlights!
75. Why did the hockey fan bring binoculars?
To keep an “ice” on the puck!
Hockey Puns Galore
76. What do hockey players and donuts have
in common?
They both have goals inside!
77. Why was the hockey team so confident?
They had an ice attitude!
78. Why did the hockey player start
gardening?
They wanted to grow their hat tricks!
79. What do you call a hockey player who
loves to dance?
A skat-er!
80. Why did the hockey puck refuse to go to
school?
It felt too flat!
Hockey Celebration Jokes
81. How do hockey players celebrate
birthdays?
With a slap-happy party!
82. Why did the hockey player eat cake before
the game?
They needed to get their energy “icing” level
up!
83. What do hockey players wear to parties?
Their ice suits!
84. Why do hockey players always win at
musical chairs?
They’re great at sliding into position!
85. What do hockey players use to blow out
candles?
A penalty whistle!
Hockey and Weather Jokes
86. Why do hockey players love winter?
Because the ice is always ready!
87. What’s a hockey player’s favorite season?
Hockey season, of course!
88. Why did the hockey game stop during a
storm?
Too many hat tricks created a wind tunnel!
89. What do hockey players call a hot day?
A melt-down!
90. Why do hockey players bring scarves to
games?
In case it gets chilly near the fans!
Hockey and Food Jokes
91. What do hockey players eat for lunch?
Slap-sandwiches!
92. Why did the hockey player bring a banana
to the rink?
For a quick slip pass!
93. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
vegetable?
Ice-berg lettuce!
94. Why did the hockey player avoid eating
too much cake?
They didn’t want to get iced out!
95. What’s a hockey team’s favorite dessert?
Hat-trick cupcakes!
Hat Trick Jokes
96. Why did the hockey player love hats?
Because they loved scoring hat tricks!
97. What do you call three hats stacked on top
of each other?
A triple threat!
98. Why did the hockey player open a hat
store?
They were a hat-trick entrepreneur!
99. What kind of hat does a goalie wear?
A save cap!
100. Why do hockey fans love hats?
Because they get thrown on the ice during
hat tricks!
Hockey Equipment Jokes
101. Why did the hockey stick start a band?
It wanted to play rock and roll-overs!
102. What do hockey pucks do when
they’re bored?
They spin around for fun!
103. Why did the goalie’s pads go to the
doctor?
They felt worn out!
104. Why did the hockey net apply for a
job?
It wanted to catch something new!
105. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
piece of jewelry?
A slap bracelet!
Hockey Travel Jokes
106. Why don’t hockey players drive sports
cars?
They prefer ice cruisers!
107. What’s a hockey team’s favorite mode
of transportation?
The Zamboni Express!
108. Why did the hockey player refuse to
fly?
They preferred staying grounded like the
ice!
109. What do you call a hockey player lost
in the desert?
Puckless in the sands!
110. Why do hockey teams love buses?
They help the team stick together!
Hockey History Jokes
111. Why did the hockey player study
ancient history?
To learn about the ice age!
112. What’s the most historical hockey
move?
The slapshot heard ‘round the world!
113. Who’s the most famous hockey player
in history?
Alexander the Great-Goalie!
114. Why did the archaeologist bring a
hockey stick?
To dig into the past of ice sports!
115. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
period in history?
The “Stanley Cup” era!
Slapshot Jokes
116. Why did the slapshot get a speeding
ticket?
It was going too fast on the ice!
117. What’s a slapshot’s favorite type of
music?
Heavy puck-metal!
118. Why did the slapshot go to the gym?
To work on its power play!
119. What do you call a slapshot that
doesn’t score?
A missed opportunity!
120. Why was the slapshot always in a
rush?
It had a goal to reach!
Hockey Player Jokes
121. Why did the hockey player cross the
rink?
To get to the penalty box!
122. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
holiday?
Hat-Trick-or-Treat!
123. Why did the hockey player stay home?
They were feeling a bit off-sides!
124. What do hockey players call their best
friends?
Ice mates!
125. Why did the hockey player get
promoted?
They always delivered top-shelf results!
Funny Goal Jokes
126. What do you call a goal scored by a
vegetable?
A hat-trick lettuce shot!
127. Why don’t goals tell secrets?
They’re always out in the open!
128. What’s a goalie’s favorite bedtime
story?
“Saving the Day: A Goal-tastic Tale!”
129. What do you call a hockey goal with
glasses?
A spec-tacular score!
130. Why did the goal get so many fans?
It was a net sensation!
Hockey Rink Jokes
131. Why did the ice at the hockey rink
crack?
It couldn’t handle the pressure of a slapshot!
132. What’s a hockey rink’s favorite movie?
“Ice Age!”
133. Why did the hockey rink blush?
It saw a great play and felt ice-shamed!
134. Why are hockey rinks bad at telling
jokes?
Because they always crack up!
135. What do hockey rinks use to fix
problems?
A Zamboni and a sense of humor!
Silly Hockey One-Liners
136. I told my hockey stick a joke, and it
couldn’t handle it!
137. My skates love ice cream—they
always go for a double scoop!
138. A puck’s favorite advice: “Stay on the
ice and roll with it!”
139. I tried to play hockey with a donut, but
it kept disappearing!
140. A referee’s favorite game? “Whistle
while you work!”
Hockey Practice Jokes
141. Why did the hockey player always
show up early?
To get a head start on goals!
142. What’s the hardest part about hockey
practice?
Getting stuck in traffic on the way to the rink!
143. Why did the coach bring cookies to
practice?
To reward sweet moves on the ice!
144. What do hockey players say when
they’re tired?
“Ice need a break!”
145. Why do hockey players love practice?
Because it’s where the magic happens!
Goalie Jokes
146. Why don’t goalies ever play cards?
They’re afraid of getting dealt a bad hand!
147. What do goalies and superheroes
have in common?
They both save the day!
148. Why did the goalie eat a sandwich
before the game?
They needed to fill the gap!
149. What’s a goalie’s favorite movie?
“The Save Avengers!”
150. Why don’t goalies ever need
umbrellas?
They block everything that comes their way!
Penalty Jokes
151. Why did the hockey player get sent to
the penalty box?
They couldn’t stop cracking jokes on the ice!
152. What do you call a penalty with a
sense of humor?
A slap-laugh!
153. Why don’t hockey players like
penalties?
They put a freeze on the fun!
154. Why did the penalty box tell a joke?
To lighten the tension!
155. What do referees say to a player in the
penalty box?
“Puck up your attitude!”
Hockey Celebration Jokes
156. How do hockey players celebrate big
wins?
They throw a puck-tacular party!
157. Why did the hockey team bring a
piñata?
To practice their slapshots during the
celebration!
158. What’s a hockey team’s favorite song?
“Ice Ice Baby!”
159. Why do hockey teams love
dance-offs?
They’ve already mastered great moves on
the ice!
160. What do hockey players eat during
celebrations?
Cake with icing, of course!
Hockey Puns for Laughs
161. Why did the hockey player go to the
library?
To check out some slap-shots of knowledge!
162. What do you call a funny hockey
team?
Hockey-hee-hees!
163. Why do hockey players love frozen
yogurt?
Because it’s always chill!
164. What do you call a hockey player who
tells jokes?
A puck-tivist comedian!
165. Why was the hockey stick always
laughing?
It found everything too pun-ny!
Hockey Referee Jokes
166. Why do referees love books?
They’re great at making calls on the rules!
167. Why did the referee bring a magnifying
glass?
To spot all the tiny infractions!
168. What’s a referee’s favorite drink?
Whistle-tea!
169. Why did the referee tell a joke?
To break the ice during the game!
170. What do referees dream about?
Perfectly played games with no penalties!
Animal Hockey Jokes
171. What do you call a bear who plays
hockey?
A slap-polar bear!
172. Why did the penguin join the hockey
team?
They already had the sliding skills!
173. What’s a hockey-playing dog’s favorite
move?
The paw-shot!
174. Why do ducks make great hockey
players?
They always “quack” the puck!
175. What’s a fish’s favorite position in
hockey?
Goalie, because they love to swim to the
save!
Hockey Riddles
176. I’m flat, round, and always moving.
What am I?
A hockey puck!
177. I’m on ice but never melt. What am I?
A hockey rink!
178. I have laces, but I’m not a shoe. What
am I?
Hockey skates!
179. I wear a mask, but I’m not a
superhero. Who am I?
A hockey goalie!
180. I make things smooth and shiny, but
I’m not a mirror. What am I?
A Zamboni!
Quick One-Liners
181. Hockey players never get tired—they
just glide through life!
182. I told my skates a joke, but they said,
“Cut it out!”
183. Hockey players always score big in
life—they’ve got goals!
184. Why did the puck cross the road? To
get to the other rink!
185. I tried playing hockey on my
driveway—it was a real slap-lane disaster!
Winter-Themed Hockey Jokes
186. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
winter activity?
Scoring snow goals!
187. Why do hockey players love
snowstorms?
It makes the rink feel even cooler!
188. What’s a hockey team’s favorite winter
treat?
Ice-cream cones with slapshots of flavor!
189. Why don’t hockey players shovel
snow?
They’re used to sweeping the puck, not the
driveway!
190. What’s the difference between a
snowman and a hockey player?
One melts, and the other wins games!
Hockey and School Jokes
191. Why do hockey players do so well in
math?
They’re great at calculating angles for their
shots!
192. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
subject in school?
History—they love the Stanley Cup stories!
193. Why don’t hockey players like spelling
bees?
They prefer scoring goals, not spelling them!
194. How do hockey players do their
homework?
With stick-to-itiveness!
195. Why did the hockey player bring their
stick to school?
For some slap-shot math practice!
Hockey Parent Jokes
196. What do hockey parents yell when
their kids do well?
“That’s my ice kid!”
197. Why do hockey parents always carry
snacks?
To keep their energy level up during long
games!
198. What do you call a hockey mom with a
whistle?
The referee-in-chief!
199. Why did the hockey dad get a new
truck?
To carry all the gear for tournaments!
200. What’s a hockey parent’s favorite
sport?
Cheering louder than the crowd!
Slapstick Hockey Humor
201. Why did the hockey player bring a
ladder to the rink?
They wanted to climb the leaderboard!
202. What do hockey players do when
they’re bored?
They play “ice-spy!”
203. Why did the hockey stick go to art
school?
It wanted to work on its slapshot
masterpiece!
204. What’s a hockey puck’s favorite
candy?
Jawbreakers—they’re tough like the game!
205. Why do hockey players always stay
calm?
Because they know how to keep their cool!
Hockey and Animals Jokes
206. What do you call a cat that plays
hockey?
A slap-tiger!
207. Why did the horse join the hockey
team?
To help the team gallop to victory!
208. What’s a hockey-playing turtle’s best
skill?
Sticking to the basics!
209. Why do polar bears love hockey?
Because they’re always on the ice!
210. What do hockey players say to a
cheering owl?
“Hoo’s your favorite player?”
Hockey Team Jokes
211. Why did the hockey team go to the
comedy club?
To hear some slapstick jokes!
212. What’s a hockey team’s favorite
vegetable?
Slap-peas!
213. Why do hockey teams never argue?
They’re all on the same ice page!
214. What do you call a hockey team that
loves the beach?
The Ice Surfers!
215. Why did the hockey team bring an
extra puck?
In case they needed to double the fun!
Hockey Coach Jokes
216. Why did the coach go to art class?
To draw up better plays!
217. What’s a hockey coach’s favorite
color?
Ice blue!
218. Why did the hockey coach always
carry a marker?
To draw winning strategies on the fly!
219. How do hockey coaches stay so
patient?
They’ve mastered the art of freezing their
emotions!
220. What’s a hockey coach’s favorite
dessert?
Goal-den brownies!
Funny Hockey Comparisons
221. What’s the difference between a
hockey game and a bakery?
One has icing penalties, and the other has
icing on the cake!
222. What’s the difference between hockey
players and comedians?
Hockey players score goals, while
comedians score laughs!
223. What’s the difference between a goalie
and a snowman?
A snowman doesn’t have to save shots!
224. What’s the difference between a
hockey player and a magician?
One pulls off hat tricks, and the other pulls
rabbits out of hats!
225. What’s the difference between a
Zamboni and a rollercoaster?
One smooths the ice, and the other twists
and turns!
Hockey and Friends Jokes
226. Why do hockey players make great
friends?
They’re always willing to assist!
227. What’s a hockey team’s favorite game
off the rink?
Freeze tag!
228. Why are hockey players great at
surprises?
Because they know how to deliver a big
slapshot reveal!
229. What do hockey players say to their
best friend?
“You’re my hat-trick buddy!”
230. Why did the hockey player start a
book club?
To share some ice-citing reads!
Goofy Hockey Jokes
231. Why did the Zamboni bring a
flashlight?
To see through the ice fog!
232. What do you call a hockey stick that
loves jokes?
A pun-tastic slapstick!
233. Why did the puck take a nap?
It needed a break after all the sliding
around!
234. What’s a goalie’s favorite animal?
A net-minder dog!
235. What do hockey players say when
they want quiet?
“Let’s ice it down!”
Hockey Gear Jokes
236. Why did the hockey player bring a
helmet to the beach?
To protect their head from “wave” shots!
237. Why don’t hockey players ever lose
their gloves?
Because they always keep a “hand” on the
situation!
238. What do hockey skates say to each
other?
“Let’s stick together and glide through this!”
239. Why did the hockey stick refuse to
play?
It felt like it was being bent out of shape!
240. What’s a hockey player’s favorite type
of clothing?
A slapshot sweater!
Ice and Snow Jokes
241. What do you call a snowman who
loves hockey?
A slap-chilly scorer!
242. Why did the ice rink get promoted?
It always kept its cool under pressure!
243. What do you get when you cross
hockey with snowboarding?
The coolest sports mash-up ever!
244. Why do hockey players never worry
about getting cold?
Because they’ve got ice in their veins!
245. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
winter game?
Freeze and Seek!
More Hockey Animal Jokes
246. Why did the lion play hockey?
It wanted to prove it was the king of the rink!
247. What do you call a hockey-playing
cow?
A slap-moo goalie!
248. Why did the raccoon join the hockey
team?
Because it loved to chase the puck all night
long!
249. What do you call a pig who plays
hockey?
A slap-ham star!
250. Why did the hockey team adopt a
parrot?
To cheer them on with “Puck yeah!”
Goalie Jokes
251. Why did the goalie always get top
marks in school?
Because they’re excellent at blocking
distractions!
252. What’s a goalie’s favorite dessert?
Save-ed ice cream!
253. Why did the goalie bring a beach ball
to the game?
They wanted to make an extra big save!
254. What do goalies and librarians have in
common?
They both love quiet saves!
255. Why was the goalie great at telling
stories?
They always had a dramatic save in every
tale!
Hockey and Food Jokes
256. What’s a hockey player’s favorite fruit?
Slap-apples!
257. Why do hockey players love
pancakes?
Because they’re great at flipping their game
around!
258. What do hockey players say to ice
cream?
“You’re cool like us!”
259. Why don’t hockey players eat fast
food?
Because they prefer their meals stick to the
goal—healthy ones!
260. What do you call a hockey team with a
sweet tooth?
The Sugar Slapshots!
Funny One-Liners
261. Hockey players are so cool, they give
winter a run for its money!
262. I told my hockey stick a joke, but it
didn’t crack—it’s solid wood!
263. Why did the puck go to therapy? It felt
like it was being slapped around too much!
264. A hockey player’s favorite vacation
spot? The ice caps!
265. Why don’t hockey players ever get
dizzy? They’re used to skating in circles!
Hockey Referee Jokes
266. Why did the referee bring a book to
the game?
To call all the plays by the book!
267. What’s a referee’s favorite type of
music?
Anything with a good whistle tone!
268. Why don’t referees play hockey?
Because they’re too busy making the calls!
269. What do referees use to clean their
house?
A penalty broom—it sweeps everything
clean!
270. Why did the referee take a nap?
To recharge their whistle power!
Team Spirit Jokes
271. Why did the hockey team always win?
Because they iced the competition!
272. What do hockey players say to each
other before a big game?
“Let’s puck this up!”
273. Why does the hockey team never split
up?
Because they know they’re stronger
together!
274. What’s a hockey team’s favorite
workout?
Ice-ometrics!
275. Why did the team celebrate with a
giant cake?
Because it was a hat-trick treat!
Hockey Knock-Knock Jokes
276. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ice.
Ice who?
Ice to meet you—let’s play hockey!
277. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Puck.
Puck who?
Puck your skates on—it’s game time!
278. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Goal.
Goal who?
Goal-ly, you’re funny!
279. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Zamboni.
Zamboni who?
Zamboni your team is on the ice—it’s time to
play!
280. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Slap.
Slap who?
Slap yourself for not getting that save!
Hockey Puck Jokes
281. Why did the puck refuse to get in the
net?
It wanted to stick around on the ice!
282. What’s a puck’s favorite dance move?
The slide-and-glide shuffle!
283. Why don’t pucks ever get lonely?
Because they’re always surrounded by
players!
284. What’s a puck’s favorite holiday?
Slapsgiving—it’s all about sharing shots!
285. Why did the puck join the circus?
It loved all the spinning acts!
Hockey and Winter Jokes
286. Why do hockey players love winter?
Because their game is always in season!
287. What’s a hockey player’s least favorite
weather?
A sudden thaw—it ruins the ice!
288. Why don’t hockey players build
snowmen?
They’re too busy making slapshots, not
snowballs!
289. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
winter drink?
Hot cocoa—with extra “icing!”
290. Why do hockey players love
snowflakes?
Because no two games are the same, just
like snowflakes!
Hockey Coach Jokes
291. Why did the coach go to the bank?
To check their “goal” savings!
292. What’s a hockey coach’s favorite
workout?
Bench-pressing new players onto the team!
293. Why do hockey coaches love writing?
They’re always drawing up plays!
294. What do coaches say when their team
is losing?
“Don’t skate on thin ice—get your heads in
the game!”
295. What’s the first rule of hockey
coaching?
Always keep your cool—on and off the ice!
Slapstick Hockey Jokes
296. Why did the hockey stick get in
trouble?
It couldn’t resist “cross-checking” everyone!
297. What do hockey players call their
skate laces?
Goal-getters!
298. Why did the hockey stick feel sad?
It thought it was being “used” too much!
299. What’s a hockey player’s favorite type
of comedy?
Slapstick humor, of course!
300. Why did the Zamboni tell a joke?
To smooth things over!
Hockey Rink Jokes
301. Why did the hockey rink get
promoted?
It always kept things cool and level!
302. What do you call a haunted hockey
rink?
The “ice-scream” arena!
303. Why do rinks make great party
venues?
Because they’re always “chill!”
304. What’s a rink’s favorite chore?
Sweeping the ice clean with a Zamboni!
305. Why did the hockey rink get an
award?
For being the coolest place in town!
Hockey Fan Jokes
306. Why did the fan bring a sign to the
game?
To show their goal-dedication!
307. What do hockey fans eat during
games?
Puck-corn and slap-snacks!
308. Why are hockey fans so smart?
Because they can read the game like a
book!
309. What do you call a fan who cheers for
every team?
A “net-ural” supporter!
310. Why did the fan sit behind the goalie?
For a better view of all the saves!
More Hockey Knock-Knock Jokes
311. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ice.
Ice who?
Ice the puck before it’s too late!
312. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Hockey.
Hockey who?
Hockey glad we’re friends? Let’s play!
313. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ref.
Ref who?
Ref-lecting on how fun this game is!
314. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Net.
Net who?
Net you know this game is awesome!
315. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Skate.
Skate who?
Skate to where the puck is going, not where
it’s been!
Hockey and Sports Jokes
316. Why do hockey players make great
soccer players?
They’re amazing at handling goals!
317. What do you call a hockey player who
tries basketball?
A slam-dunker with a hockey stick!
318. Why do hockey players avoid
baseball?
They’re afraid of getting stuck on the bench!
319. Why did the hockey team try tennis?
To practice their net shots!
320. What’s a hockey player’s least favorite
sport?
Ice fishing—it’s too slow!
Hockey Player Life Jokes
321. Why do hockey players always get up
early?
To “face-off” the day right!
322. What’s a hockey player’s favorite type
of car?
One with ice control!
323. Why do hockey players love early
games?
So they can have more time to chill later!
324. What do hockey players say when
they’re tired?
“I need to cool down on the bench!”
325. Why do hockey players love
weekends?
It’s their prime time for slapshots!
Hockey Equipment Jokes
326. Why did the hockey stick go to
school?
To brush up on its slapshots!
327. What do hockey players call their
lucky skates?
Their “goal shoes!”
328. Why did the helmet start a band?
It wanted to be the headliner!
329. What’s a hockey stick’s favorite
subject in school?
Geometry—it loves all the angles!
330. Why do hockey skates always win
races?
They’re on a roll!
Hockey Goal Jokes
331. Why did the hockey puck cross the
ice?
To get to the goal on the other side!
332. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
bedtime story?
“The Little Goal That Could!”
333. Why don’t hockey players ever forget
their goals?
Because they’re always in the back of their
minds!
334. What do you call a goal that tells
jokes?
A laugh-net!
335. Why did the hockey goal feel shy?
It didn’t want to be in the spotlight!
Hockey Animal Jokes
336. Why did the penguin join the hockey
team?
Because it was born to slide on ice!
337. What’s a hockey-playing alligator’s
favorite move?
The “snap-shot!”
338. Why did the polar bear love hockey?
It felt right at home on the ice!
339. What do you call a moose who scores
goals?
A moose on the loose!
340. Why did the cat love playing hockey?
Because it had nine chances to score!
Funny Hockey Comparisons
341. How is a hockey game like a pizza?
They’re both best served hot with plenty of
slices!
342. What’s the difference between a
hockey game and a math test?
In hockey, you aim for the net, not the
answer key!
343. Why is hockey like a superhero
movie?
Because it’s full of action, saves, and
dramatic finishes!
344. How is hockey like a magic show?
The puck disappears right before your eyes!
345. Why is a hockey stick like a magician’s
wand?
It creates wonders on the ice!
More Knock-Knock Hockey Jokes
346. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Rink.
Rink who?
Rink you glad we’re playing hockey?
347. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Save.
Save who?
Save me a seat at the game!
348. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Coach.
Coach who?
Coach you later—I’m heading to practice!
349. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Shot.
Shot who?
Shot we get back on the ice?
350. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Slap.
Slap who?
Slap on your skates, it’s time to play!
Hockey and Science Jokes
351. Why are hockey players great at
physics?
They understand the force of a slapshot!
352. What do you call a hockey game in
outer space?
A galaxy face-off!
353. Why did the hockey player bring a
telescope to practice?
To keep an eye on the stars of the game!
354. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
planet?
Ice-olation on Pluto!
355. Why did the scientist play hockey?
They wanted to experiment with team
chemistry!
Zamboni Jokes
356. Why did the Zamboni start a YouTube
channel?
To share its smooth moves!
357. What’s a Zamboni’s favorite subject in
school?
Art—it loves clean slates!
358. Why did the Zamboni break up with its
partner?
It needed to clear its ice!
359. What do Zambonis do at parties?
They’re the smooth operators!
360. Why don’t Zambonis ever get lost?
They follow a clear path every time!
Hockey Pun Jokes
361. Why did the hockey team go to the
bakery?
To practice icing!
362. What’s a hockey player’s favorite type
of music?
Ice-rock!
363. Why did the puck break up with the
net?
It felt trapped!
364. What’s a hockey fan’s favorite drink?
Hot chocolate with a shot of slapstick
humor!
365. Why did the ice love the Zamboni?
Because it kept things smooth between
them!
Hockey Practice Jokes
366. Why did the hockey player bring a
ladder to practice?
To reach new heights in their game!
367. What’s a hockey coach’s favorite type
of drill?
A power play drill!
368. Why do hockey players never skip
practice?
They don’t want to skate on thin ice with
their coach!
369. What do hockey players say after a
tough practice?
“That was un-ice-ceptable!”
370. Why did the hockey player bring a
flashlight to practice?
To find the puck in the dark corners!
Hockey Players' Everyday Life Jokes
371. What do hockey players eat for
breakfast?
Slapjacks and syrup!
372. Why did the hockey player wear
skates to the grocery store?
They wanted to check out quickly!
373. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
school subject?
PE—because it’s all about teamwork!
374. Why do hockey players love
weekends?
It’s the perfect time to face-off with friends!
375. What do hockey players always pack
for road trips?
Their “goal” essentials!
Hockey Fan Jokes
376. Why did the fan wear a scarf to the
game?
To stay warm in the cool arena!
377. What do hockey fans do when their
team scores?
They shout “goal” louder than a foghorn!
378. Why did the fan bring a cowbell to the
game?
To make sure their cheers were heard on
the ice!
379. What’s a hockey fan’s favorite kind of
wave?
The stadium wave!
380. Why did the hockey fan bring a
notebook?
To jot down their favorite plays!
Funny Hockey Announcer Jokes
381. Why did the announcer lose their
voice?
They kept shouting, “What a goal!”
382. What’s an announcer’s favorite game
moment?
A breakaway goal—it’s thrilling to call!
383. Why did the announcer bring a
dictionary to the game?
To find new words for “amazing!”
384. How do announcers stay warm in the
rink?
By staying fired up about the game!
385. Why do announcers love overtime?
It’s extra time to shine!
Goalie-Specific Jokes
386. Why did the goalie go to the library?
To check out a book on “how to block
everything!”
387. What’s a goalie’s favorite song?
“Another One Blocks the Puck!”
388. Why don’t goalies ever get lost?
They always stay in their crease!
389. What’s a goalie’s favorite holiday?
Save-mas—it’s all about giving back!
390. Why did the goalie bring a map to the
game?
To always know where the puck was
heading!
Hockey Celebration Jokes
391. How do hockey players celebrate
birthdays?
With an “ice-cream” party!
392. Why do hockey players love New
Year’s Eve?
Because they get to practice their
countdown skills!
393. What’s a hockey team’s favorite
celebration song?
“We Will Slap You!”
394. Why did the team throw confetti after
the game?
They scored a hat trick of celebrations!
395. What’s the best way to celebrate a
win?
With a team “face-off” selfie!
Hockey Rivalry Jokes
396. Why did the hockey team bring
binoculars?
To keep an eye on their rivals!
397. What’s a hockey player’s least favorite
word?
“Offside!”
398. Why did the rivals refuse to play
cards?
They didn’t trust each other’s shuffles!
399. What do hockey players call a friendly
rival?
A “puck buddy!”
400. Why did the rivalry turn into a
friendship?
They realized they both loved hockey more
than anything!
Hockey and Food Jokes
401. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
snack?
“Icy pops!”
402. Why do hockey players never spill
their drinks?
They’re great at balancing on ice!
403. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
meal?
Slap-shot spaghetti!
404. Why do hockey players avoid spicy
food?
They don’t want to melt the ice with their hot
breath!
405. What’s a hockey player’s favorite
dessert?
Puck-shaped cookies!